I’m afraid I am becoming a “coffee drinker.” Not one of those coffee-obsessed maniacs who takes their coffee dark roast, heavily sugared, and no cream (or the like), but someone who drinks at least one cup of coffee. The past couple of days have been “two cup” kind of days. Even after two cups of coffee, I found myself nodding off at my desk and covering yawns.
Both the combination of an energy drink + one cup of coffee as well as two cups of coffee end up giving me the jitters. I apparently can’t handle it anymore. It doesn’t bother my stomach like it used to (which nowadays, just about anything does and it’s quite unpredictable what and when….tmi), but since taking anxiety medication, I have found my body is more sensitive to caffeine…
So why do I keep craving more?
If those two cups of coffee still aren’t keeping me from blinking my eyes and finding that two or three minutes have passed, then why do I still drink it? If I yawn all day then sit up late at night then why bother?
On another note, I am going to try to stop taking the melatonin supplements at night to see if that helps combat the daily fatigue. It isn’t like they’re helping all that much anymore anyways. I understand most of my medications have a side effect of drowsiness (a common side effect for most medications, I have discovered). The ENT could not find anything truly wrong with me to explain the fatigue. After receiving the prescriptions for anxiety/depression medications, however, I discovered that depression was the likely culprit.
I find myself in a pit and to pull myself out, I look for a sense of comfort. Right now, it seems that immediate comfort is a cup of coffee. I’ll take it just about any way. I am not picky. I’ll even drink it lukewarm and iced coffee is my favorite. Who cares if it’s been sitting on the table for two hours? Sugar or no sugar? Doesn’t matter (something I used to think for some reason was an utterly gross thing to do). With or without creamer? Whichever. Chocolate Almond Biscotti or Pumpkin Spice (perfect for this lovely time of the year)? Either one.
I fear this is going to start an expensive habit. Good thing there is no Starbucks near me.